Howdy. I had a productive day. Deep cleaned my room, worked out, and made some new graphics for my website. I am halfway through a bottle of wine.. I feel good. I got some music playing in the background and I'm about to play games with korrin and friends. Here's what I made today:


   

Check out the "my graphics" page for more!

"You will look into the faces of passers by hoping for something
that will, for an instant, bring me back to you.

You will find moonlit nights strangely empty because when you
call my name through them, there will be no answer.

Always your heart will be aching for me and your mind will give
you the doubtful consolation that you did a brave thing."

(video is at the bottom) Hey, I hope you're doing well. I am having a very lazy day today. I have today and tomorrow off, and I have no plans except working on my website and playing VTMB. I woke up around 11, rolled around in bed watching IG reels, and now I am here. Just making a quick post that I have been meaning to make since Halloween! And then I am going to go workout for an hour or so, take a shower, and then... games or website idk.

I've been working out every day in our garage. We have some nice gym equipment and I have been taking full advantage of learning how to use them in private. That's what always kept me from going to a public gym! Fear of embarrasment since I had NO idea what I was doing. But now that I've been doing this for a week or 2, that seems so dumb. It's so easy to learn. I feel so good too, physically and mentally, I should've done this years ago. I'm sick of being a skinny ass bitch, I want to have muscles. I WANNA BE HOT!

Anyways... I ALMOST GOT SHOT IN ALBUQUERQUE ON HALLOWEEN. That night was a lot of fun overall. Good drinks, time with friends, cool costumes, cute boys everywhere. I had a really good time. Towards the end of the night, my friends and I got some beatboxes at a liqour store and just walked around central ABQ just drinking and talking with people. We found a little space to sit and chill, and we were only there for a short time before shit went down.

I will explain first. To start, I was SHITFACED drunk. Could barely stand.. slurring and shit.. I was GONE. We're sitting there having a good time when these 2 girls RUN past us. My friend followed them cuz she was very drunk too and wanted to compliment their costumes. They took her hand and said "Gun, RUN!". I couldn't see down either side of the street from where I was sitting. Sam could, as she was on the sidewalk. She went "Wait...", turned and looked behind her, and then RAN at me like WE GOTTA GO.

I didn't see anything, so I had no idea why we were running. In my drunk state I was thinking "Oh shit they're excited to go to the next spot, or maybe they wanted to go with some people" IDK! But when I ran after them and got to the corner, Drea was like "There's a guy right there with a gun, we gotta go" The guy was 10 to 15 feet behind us. I said "Okay... That's all the info I need" But I was interrupted by a ton of gunshots. We RAN for our lives, and for whatever reason, I could not stop laughing. You always think about how you'll handle a situation like that, apparently I just laugh...

We ran into an alley, and that was the part where I felt genuine fear. Before we got behind cover I was thinking "PLEASE DON'T LET US GET HIT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE". It was terrifying for a second. But we got away, we met up with these guys and stayed with them until we found police and talked to them. They told us to go home so Drea had her husband get us and we went back to her place. I threw up in the bathroom and then went to bed.

Since that night, We've found a video online from someone elses POV. It was a guy on a motorcycle who was the person that was being shot at... I think?? idk. When it happened, my friends and I thought it was people arguing, or maybe gang violence, but to learn that it was just some random tweaker walking around with a gun... That was really scary. What if we didn't run? Here's a pic of the man standing RIGHT in front of where we were sitting:



The IG account in this pic is the one that posted his POV. I suggest you take a peek at his account and watch it. He recorded that at the same time as I was recording while running around the corner. He drove past us.

There's a chance I could've died that night. Imagine my family having to identify my body when I was dressed as THE CROW. Being shot and killed in ABQ by a tweaker as I look like the crow... what a way to go. Anyways.. This has gone on long enough.. Here's the video, I am going to go work out: (AND YES, I KNOW I HAVE ZERO SURVIVAL INSTINCTS)


I love living in America..

Hiiii. This is a little post to say that I have been making and uploading stuff to my graphics page, so check it out. Here's some of what I've made recently:





  

Just got home from working all day. Drank some wine. I am blasting music from my speaker. Chillin in my underwear. There's chicken waiting for me in the microwave. I have to be back at work at 6am so I won't spend too much time babbling. I've been working 40 hour weeks to save up some money for going out on Halloween and another possible Texas trip before the end of the year.

I'm going to Vegas for the first time next year in May with my mom and my gay uncle. We're going out and enjoying Vegas the first night. Then we're seeing No Doubt perform live at the sphere the 2nd night. Words cannot express how excited I am. I LOVE NO DOUBT. I was a bit obsessed with them in 2023. That means I can't kill myself until after May... ugh.

I think that's about all going on with me right now... I think I am going to smoke a bowl and play Tomb Raider Chronicles until like midnight. I plan on waking up at like 4 something in the morning.

Anyways.. I hope you're well. Here's some music:

Hello I spent most of today making minor changes around here. Here's some of what I did:

★ Added some graphics to the "Others" page and changed the layout a bit. Check that out here.

★ I added over 60 images to the page for pics taken with my Samsung WB150F camera.

★ Uploaded some new pictures to my pics page.



I am still sick. I'm feeling better but I'm still very congested. Bleh. I am going to make a sandwich and play Tomb Raider AOD. I'll see ya later.

This band is one of my top favorites. Their lyrics strike a chord with me.
The 1996 album, Live In Poland, is amazing start to finish. Places is also a great EP.

Dreams are such a fascinating part of life. I got home after my 16 hour hell shift yesterday and noticed that my cough hurt a bit more than normal. I went to bed hoping for the best, but woke up around 8 this morning feeling like shit. I scrolled through reels on IG for a few minutes before rolling over and going back to sleep.

That's when I had my fever dream.. best way I could describe that. I can never remember them except for when I fall back asleep in the morning. I was somewhere in Colorado at this nice hotel. I was with a guy that I briefly dated a few months ago and his friends. The room we were in looked like one of those hotel banquet rooms, but converted into a huge room with wide beds everywhere. The ceiling was so high up and the windows covered the walls top to bottom. I kept trying to talk to everyone, but nobody could understand me or was listening to me.

On top of that, I kept misplacing all of my stuff and couldn't find anything. And for whatever reason I was supposed to catch a flight back to NM, but ended up missing it? My memory of the dream is kinda foggy. I think I ended up driving home? It doesn't matter. I woke up feeling the same stress and panic that I felt in my dream. And then I got on Youtube and one of the first shorts I came across was a clip from a movie where a girl was trying to explain what was happening to her, CLEARLY, but nobody understood or listened to her. That shit stressed me out even more.



Anyways... I feel like shit. I am so sick. I just ate dinner and drank some Nyquil.. I think it's time to lay in bed and play Little Big Planet 2 until I pass out. I just wanted to ramble. I have the next 2 days off and all I plan on doing is resting and maybe working on my website. I'll see ya later.

I have finally been consumed with the urge to work on my website. I hope it sticks. I just wanted to make a small post to mention some updates I have made around here today:

★ I decorated my home page for Halloween! I love changing up the theme for holidays.. I can't wait for christmas! I'm going to bring back the dog playing piano to Sims 1 music... (scroll to the bottom)

★ I uploaded over 100 blinkies to my collection. I have been bitten by the blinkie bug.

★ I made some dollz and uploaded them to that page.

★ I added a handful of songs to the iPod playlist on my home page.



And these are some ideas I have for future updates:

☆ A new theme for this page. I might actually do that after finishing this.. so no more Cocteau Twins theme. I also need a better way of linking to past posts. I might make a seperate page for that, I don't know.

☆ I either need to upload more buttons or remove that page. I am pretty sure that page has remained unchanged since 2018 or 2019...

☆ finishing shrines....

☆ MORE COOL SHIT PAGES



I don't knowww. I need to finish or update so many pages around here. Blah. I need to go to bed. I'm going to be at work from 6am until around 10:15pm tomorrow. I have like 2.5 hours on break though.. so that's good. I need the money.

I enjoyed yesterday and today off. I spent most of it rotting in bed watching that 70s show or replaying Silent Hill 3, which I finished earlier today before taking a nap until a few hours ago. It's storming now, the thunder is loud as shit. I want to keep working on my website but I'm waking up at 4... AHHHH. Okay . Well. I will see you later Here's some music:

Hello! I never update my website anymore... Real life is taking over and I rarely have time to rot and get lost in code. I'm sitting at my computer having a glass of wine. By a glass I mean having a few sips of my boxed wine straight from the tap. I haven't been drinking as much since I got home from my Texas trip.

Speaking of which, that was an emotional roller coaster. I had an amazing time seeing most of my friends. I love those bitches more than words could ever express.

Anywaysysysysys. I didn't come here to ramble too much. Here's something I just made in Photoshop:



I love messing around in Photoshop.

Anywayssssssssssss. One of my regulars at work gave me some weed today and I am itching to try it out. I only smoke before bed nowadays sooo I am gonna get stoned and lay in bed while watching That 70s show until I fall asleep. Bitch I am off the next 2 days, I am going to RELAX. I hope that you're doing well. I will see you around.

(And maybe make changes around my website teee heeee...)