Howdy. Haven't given my site a good update in over a month. I feel like I say that every time I make a post here, smh. I just haven't had the motivation! I've been working, doing stuff irl, being depressed, or playing Fallout 2 and 4 every waking moment. But anyways. I'm not here to make an update.. Well.. sorta. Like I want the "Last updated 2 weeks ago" to go away but I don't have the time to do anything around here. Or maybe I do.. I DON'T!! I just don't want to pack for tomorrow aAAAhhH.

I am leaving for Texas in about 9 hours. I'll be there for almost 2 weeks, so my website won't see any updates during that time. But let's be real, would it have seen any if I wasn't going out of state? lmfao. I haven't done anything to prepare yet. I always put things off until the last minute. I NEED to go to bed, I am going OUT tomorrow, but I am too wound up to lay down.

I've been up since 4 something this morning. Each time I visit Texas, I can't sleep before I leave. It's a mixture of excitement and HOLY SHIT I HAVE TO GET ON A PLANE AND GO IN THE SKY. I have a water bottle full of wine prepared to chug before I go into the airport. But annyyywayyys. I got up really early this morning. I got stoned and watched Jawbreaker and played Fallout 4 for a little bit before I went back to bed. Got up and went to work and now I am here. Hello.

I need to pack. I NEED TO DO LAUNDRY. AHHHH. I don't think I'm going to sleep tonight.... Well... I think I am going to drink wine and play roblox instead of being productive. I'm going to play the underground war and word bomb on there.. yaaaay. Welllllllllllll. I'll be back in like 2 weeks. Then maybe I can make time to sit down and make changes around here. I'll see you later! I got FRIENDS TO SEE, CLUBS TO DANCE AT, AND BARS TO GET WASTED IN BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

p.s. I am so relieved that man is dead.

also ugh Bent is my favorite band I LOVE THEM SO MUUUUUUCH

" My heart for now is a private road.
No thoroughfare. No heavy load. No slow traffic.
No graphic details of colder collisions.
No more stories to make me ache.

I'll always love you, Venus. Still, you are mine.
Why'd you have to take so much time in calling me?
I just want it to be easy like Sunday morning.

Snow falls in silence and covers the green.
Still you can see where the birds have been.
Hungry, but alive and free. Waiting. "

I have had nooo motivation to work on my website lately. It's a combination of being busy and being lazy. I have been doing a lot lately. I went to California for a few days last month. It was chaotic, but a lot of fun overall. I got to explore Newport beach, go to Disneyland, hang out in a nice ass AirBNB, and meet family that I haven't met before.

I got home like August 2nd or something. I didn't get back to ABQ until around 2am and I had to drive 2.5 hours back to Farmington.. So I just called out of work the next day and got a hotel. I am so glad I did. There was a Denny's right next to it so I went and got a burger that I inhaled in bed while watching forensic files. I went home the next morning and PASSED OUT.

before I continue.. here's some pics I took in my room recently:






anyways.. I had 4 days off in a row this past weekend. That hasn't happened in forever. I went to the lake Friday morning with Sam. We stayed there until around 4 or 5pm and then I went home and slept until the next day. Saturday we went out to Durango.. It was SO MUCH FUN. I spent so much money.. smh. I need to be saving up for my TX trip next month.

We explored the city and walked trails and got really really drunk. We ate and drank at Applebees before getting a hotel. We ubered to where all the bars are and just explored. I think we went to 3 or 4 different bars? If I am remembering correctly, I had 2 beatbox's, a coronarita at applebees, 2 double vodka sprites and one single, a double cherry vodka sour, and 2 vegas bombs........ I don't know how I am alive.

While we were exploring, we found a sex shop where I spent way too much money on cute underwear and some pants.... I am so broke. Sam and I were very drunk at that point and saw a small red lips couch and had a photoshoot:



Most of the night is a blur.. We somehow ended up with a random blue patio chair in the backseat of my car that we took from the outside of some medical center across from our hotel. Idk wtf I am gonna do with that. I had so much fun, I can't wait to go out in Houston next month. I'll be there from September 12th until the 22nd.. If I recall correctly. I can't WAIT TO SEE MY FRIENDS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Okay.. that's enough rambling for me.. I need to go check on my siblings tee hee I am supposed to be watching them. I will see you later! I archived my old posts to free up space on here.. I will link to them at the bottom soooon. And change the theme of this page... I love the Matrix but this shit gives me a headache.

I am so nervous! In less than 24 hours I will be on a plane heading to Orange County. It's currently 6:30 in the morning. I got up at 5am so I could have some time to prepare before I go to work, the plan is kinda crazy. I work from 1:45pm to 10pm today. When I get off I'm going to pick up a beatbox and some pods for my vape before I head home and get my shit together. I'm flying out of ABQ, so I'm going to have to leave around 2AM to drive the 2.5 hours to the airport where there will HOPEFULLY be empty spaces in the parking garage.

I should get to the airport around 4 / 4:30am. I'm going to chug the beatbox in my car and then make my way through security, like I usually do. It's honestly crazy that I've never been denied boarding.. I be drinkin. I get so scared! It's a short flight to Phoenix where I'll have an hour to eat and make my connecting flight. I should be landing in OC around 9am, which I think is 10am my time.

My mom and stepdad will pick me up and then I'll stay for 4 days. I think we might go to Disneyland? I don't care much at all for Disney shit, but I'm sure that'll be fun. They talked about going to LA so I might go to Melrose ave so I can live out my Thirteen fantasy. I'll also be meeting family that I've never met before. It's exciting.

When I come back, I land in ABQ around midnight. Then I have to drive 2.5 hours back home. I'll probably get home around 3am and then I have to clock in 3 hours after that... I work 6am to 1pm.. that's going to be fun. Besides that downside, I AM SO EXCITED. I haven't been to California since 2013 or 2014.

okay AH I am rambling I neeeed to start my laundry and maybe get my morning shower out of the way.. I might make a post right before I leave tonight, we'll see. BYE!

I updated my about me page, check it out here! It's a little fucked.. but I like it.

I created a new page for pics off a camera I have been using lately, check that out here.

I impulsively dyed my hair at 2 in the morning...



I fell off a swing and broke my toe last month... It took a few weeks to heal. It still gets sore if I'm on it too much, I loooove it. I also did this to my armpit dring the fall:



That's all I have to say for now, see you later. Here's a picture of Otterpop:

Hello! Holy shit so much has been going on in my life lately. I've been neglecting my website but not because I'm depressed this time. Just cuz I am SO busy. SO. I FINALLY have my own space. I'm sure I talked about this plan in old posts at some point, but I finally got moved out into the room in the barn. It's not as country bumpkin as you would think though... It's a decent space. I have an AC unit in the wall and I keep it feeling like a fridge in here. I'm slowly decorating and turning it into my space. It reminds me of my room at my grandparents house all those years ago. I love it, I am VERY happy about it. I took some before and after pics, check em out:







I still have some work to do, I have yet to get my boxes out of the garage. I will not be satisfied until my walls are COVERED entirely with posters.

It's nice to be able to have people over without worrying about being loud or obnoxious. Sam and I went to Chili's yesterday and then came back and spent the day painting and doing craft stuff while drinking wine and watching movies like Mean Girls, Thirteen, and Uptown Girls. It was sooo nice.

I recently subscribed to the Back To The Barre Patreon. It's a podcast by Kelly and Christi of Dance Moms and it is EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER NEEDED. I LOVE LISTENING TO THEM. They're so entertaining, and all the BTS shit they share is so good. I have been invested in Dance Moms for over 10 years LMFAOOOO.

Okay, well. I need to eat and then I think I'm going to go back to my wine and podcast. I might paint for a little bit? Idk.

I hope you're doing well! I will see you later. LISTEN TO THIS SONG, IT'S GREAT:

"My normal hesitation is gone and I really gravitate to your will.
Are you here to fetch me out? Because I've never had this taste in my mouth.

Oh, you're not old and you're not familiar.
Recently discovered and I'm learning about you.

New, you're so new. You, you're new.

And you're consuming me violently. And your reverence shamelessly tempting me.
Who sent this maniac?

Because I never had this taste in the past.
Oh, you're different, you're different from the former.
Like a fresh battery, I'm energized by you."

I just made a few updates around here.. nothing crazy. Today was a good day. I was off and caught up on my sleep. I had to go into work at 6am the last few days. When I woke up I relaxed and played Saints Row 2 for an hour or so. I ordered myself some food and coffee before hopping on my PC to play Resident Evil 6 with Korrin for a few hours. We just finished Resident Evil 5 together over the span of a couple weeks. It has been a lot of fun, it helps me not feel so sad all the time. I love Korrin so much. I also love Resident Evil, I never got too into the games until recently. I was always more into Silent Hill. I have a lot of catching up to do before RE9 comes out. Although I don't know if I can play the more recent entries.. they're scary. I couldn't handle playing The Outlast Trials with Korrin because I got too scared...

Anyways. I made some blinkies earlier and uploaded them to my graphics page. I'm going to make some more after I finish rambling. And maybe some buttons? I also want to comb through gifcities for old Geocities websites. It got updated sometime recently, It is so much better than it used to be.

That's all I have to say, I'll see ya later.

I am barely awake.. It's like 5 in the morning. I have to be at work in an hour. I just thought about my website cuz it's been a few weeks since I have been around. I am so depressed. I don't really have much to say, I'm just gonna share some songs I've been listening to a lot :D

Hiiiii. I am pretty drunk :D I love music so much, here are some songs you should listen to.

Back in 2021 I discovered Downtown randomly on YouTube one night while on acid and I fell in love with the show. Here's a part of one of my posts from July of 2021:

"Whenever I tripped the other night I decided that I HAD to own it on DVD because the episodes that are on youtube are low quality & the music is taken out of some. I stumbled across this blogspot post from 2007 posted by the guy who made the show that has a link to buy it on DVD & I sent $25 without even checking to see if it was legit first... Turns out it is. I got lucky. I got really lucky because they've been selling it since 2007 and I found it in 2021 where his most recent comment (last month) says they only have a few left. I'm so happy."

And now it's unavailable! I can't believe how lucky I was to discover it at the perfect time. And then I went to New York for the first time that September and went to places from the show. I remember when I got onto the subway from JFK that took me to Canal St, I watched the "Train Pain" episode while sitting in one of those yellow and orange subway seats.

Anyways! Here's some pics of the box and DVD's:












That's all for now, I'll see you later!